Monday 16 February 2009

a lesson learnt in time

this weekend i've begun to realize the joys of spontaneity. i'm normally one of those people who meticulously plans every day, even silly trips to town. so ringing up people and being all "right let's do something right now" is fun. take friday for instance- i brought amy home to cheer her up and we ended up down at the blue bell (again) with steven, ben and andrew and we had a lovely wine-fuelled evening. i again demonstrated my ability to attract chavs :/ seriously, i find it so hard to understand how normal, decent guys don't really ever look at me, but i seem to emit some kind of "come-hither" waves at chavs. judging by the amount of wolf whistling anyway, grrr. but yeah, i managed to control my feelings of lust for said chavs, coughcough, to drag a very drunk amy home. bless her little cotton socks, i can't believe i've suddenly become the one amongst my friends who can hold their drink, when did that happen?!

saturday was lovely too, after a day nursing my little hungover princess we met up with our coral for the gig at town hall, unfortunatly the bands were not up to scratch, but we had fun moshing about anyway. i also had a small fit of jealousy over all the year tens in selby who are better dressed than me, it made me feel physically ill. one day i will become good, i swear, and wear outfits that will make people gasp at their sheer genius. back to coral's to watch the notebook, armed with dixy chicken, and for once i didn't cry (probably because i spent most of it asleep...)

and then yesterday was francesca-filled, the best kind of day. i got to meet her lovely friends, carrie, haseeb, nicola and becca and we shared the nicest pizza in the world along with a bottle of lambrini. i made everyone watch antiques roadshow, but its disappointing now that old guy has left. just isn't the same. fact of the day: fran's mum fancies my dad. my mommy has competition, it seems! the ladies just can't get enough of our mick. oh dear...

however all this loveliness and fun days comes after a few very testing events- every silver lining comes with a cloud. i've actually had to deal with real problems, as opposed to my normal "my-hair-looks-shit-today" horrors. to one girl in particular who i hope is reading this, i'm not giving up on you, or our friendship- it just means too much to me. i've realized over the past couple of days that we need to stick together- something tells me in the next few weeks we're all going to need eachother a lot. sometimes it's hard to put a brave face on, but if we can all keep smiling i know that we'll see all this shit through. i know that it's tested my limits a lot- my mum heard me crying for the first time in goodness knows how long yesterday morning, (i tend to let films be my emotional outlet these days!) and i think i freaked her out a bit by wailing "i'm not crying about my problems, i'm crying about everyone else's!" as if i've become some crazy philanthropist in my old age. sadly not.

right i'm thinking this has been a very boring blog entry, sorry i have nothing more interesting to say... i think i need sleep/a decent book to read. but right now my dog is whimpering for me to take him out, so it's time to don my wellies and brace myself for the mud, good times for all!

oh and i am beastly excited for tomorrow, meeting grace and jack in york for shopping and nando's time. hopefully we can make "rah-expose" part two. good craic, good craic. and i've just been hit by poetical inspiration, i will mull over it as i dog-walk and write on my return!

victoria x

Well it's been a long time, long time now
Since I've seen you smile
And I'll gamble away my fright
And I'll gamble away my time
And in a year, a year or so
This will slip into the sea
Well it's been a long time, long time now
Since I've seen you smile - beirut, nantes.

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